We're all becoming familiar with the typical signs of narcissism, but what about some of the other quirks?
Here are a few you might recognise:
1.  Walking ahead of you: Some will habitually walk ahead of you in public or social settings, subtly conveying that they see themselves as more important or superior. Though it may be driven by their self-centredness and lack of consideration for others. Who knows? But it sure doesn’t feel like you’re in synch.Â
2. Â Arguments in the car: The car can be their favourite place to pick fights with you over the smallest things. Something which could easily be a forgettable discussion can turn into a full-blown argument causing your outing to be called off. Prepare to bunker down for the next 3 day fight.
3.  Ruining special occasions: Important events, celebrations and holidays are likely to be marred by their behaviour, due to their need to be the centre of attention and how threatening it can be to see their partner happy and content. Â
4.  Hurry up and wait: They might frequently rush you to get ready or leave the house as soon as possible only to make you wait indefinitely, causing you to feel frustrated and annoyed. But be careful about expressing your annoyance, because they’re going to start another fight if you do!
5.  Unsure what they like about you: You know they think you’re attractive, you’re helpful or perhaps you’re a great provider, but when it comes to your inner qualities that make you special, they seem to draw a complete blank.
6.  Lack of collaboration: It seems like you’re in a partnership with them but the evidence rarely stacks up. Instead, they’re making decisions for your future as a couple, they’re giving you options to choose from (like a parent would with a young child) and it seems strangely impossible to work together well as a team.Â
7.  Inconsistent communication: Their communication might be erratic, such as being consistently engaging for a period of time only to go for long stretches barely acknowledging your existence. There can be similarly perplexing interactions on social media - it’s not uncommon for them to ignore your posts or even your friend request, while being a very active user of the platform.Â
8.  Social norms? Don’t care!: They’re very comfortable being intrusive, and causing humiliation and embarrassment in public, while prioritising their own needs and selfish desires. Have you had a partner who repeatedly gropes you in public? Who farts loudly in stores? Who’ll interrupt people's meals and get into their personal space at restaurants to check out their food and determine if it’s something they’d like to order?Â
9.  Special requirements: Due to their need to be in control and feel special, they will often have very specific requirements when ordering food or when giving other’s instructions to complete a task for them, regardless of how inconvenient or time consuming this may be for the person fulfilling the request.Â
10. Adopting your likes and personality: At first it seems so easy to connect with them because it turns out they like a whole lot of things you like. It’s almost like they’re another version of you. Because they don’t have a strong sense of self, as time goes on you’ll notice them adopting your sayings, specific words you use, mannerisms, beliefs, etc.
If you're in a relationship with someone who's doing these things, it doesn't necessarily mean they're a narcissist. It's more important to notice patterns of behaviour, the impact of that behaviour and monitor the strength of the relationship.
If you want support unpacking and delving into the curious aspects of your relationship, feel free to book a session today.
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