About me
For as long as I can remember, I've had a fascination with what shapes us as individuals, and a desire to understand what drives our behaviour.
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Little did I know, I'd been living my own life on 'extra hard' mode due to undiagnosed neurodivergence! The upshot of not knowing I had ADHD is it's lead to an absolute gold mine of lived experience and insight, leading me to find my purpose as a counsellor.
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I offer online relationship counselling, specialising in neurodiversity and helping people recover from narcissistic abuse.
My clients are usually seeking assistance to make sense of their experiences, process their feelings and emotions, find themselves again (or for the first time), and understand what they can do to manage or avoid major interpersonal challenges in the future.
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Allow me to walk beside you and help to lighten your load. I know this road and can guide you away from the murkiness and towards a beautiful future.
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As a registered counsellor with the Australian Counselling Association you can be assured I uphold the highest professional standards.
My Story
When I was very young, my family underwent an interstate move from Tasmania to Queensland, separating us from relatives and friends. Seeking community, my parents immersed themselves in a church group which demanded substantial amounts of time, commitment and compliance. The upside was its members became our surrogate extended family, allowing me to keenly observe the dynamics of different households and the varied ways people were navigating a variety of situations. Unfortunately my own home life was a tumultuous mix. Parental discord, church-imposed ideals, obligations and priorities, financial constraints, various losses and other challenges combined, creating an environment where I often found myself in a premature role reversal. School offered little respite, as my inherent shyness clashed with years of relentless bullying. Teenage emancipation from the church brought liberation but also left me navigating uncharted waters. Early parenthood soon added huge layer of responsibility, and lacking a strong foundation, I engaged in relationships which echoed the chaotic patterns of my past—marked by manipulation, power imbalances, and an unsettling sense of déjà vu. No amount of self-help or self-development seemed to 'break the spell'. Learning about narcissistic abuse and its profound effects was pivotal. Shedding light on the intricate web of control brought a sense of recognition, clarity, and hope, hinting at the possibility of a pathway out of recurring cycles. This propelled me on a personal quest - a determined effort to understand and dismantle these destructive patterns in my life once and for all. Which brings me to now. I'm here to assist you if you've been through similar challenges, offering support and guidance to help you navigate your unique path.
Approach
Your journey of healing and growth is my priority.
For those who have experienced abusive relationships I intentionally avoid labelling you as a 'victim' or 'survivor', I also avoid using the label 'abuser', because I recognise these terms can limit your potential and keep you from moving forward.
Your experiences don't define you and don't have to be part of your identity.
To me you are a client, a human, an incredibly dynamic being who is seeking effective support because you recognise your current capacity is being limited by things like pain, confusion, shame and uncertainty.
I respect the terms you choose to use for yourself, understanding that they reflect your personal empowerment and narrative.
Together, we can focus on your strength and resilience, allowing you to take control of your trajectory and build a future free from the constraints of temporary labels.
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I have a similar approach when discussing narcissism. This is a disorder with recognised origins and pervasive patterns of behaviour. As with other disorders, those afflicted haven't chosen this path and I don't consider them to be evil or intentional in terms of (most of) the harm they cause.
I don't condone abuse. Nor do I believe in fighting fear with fear, or with misinformation - this is can be traumatising for you. ​​Instead, I can help you make sense of your experience in a way which not only helps calm your nervous system right now, but will safeguard you in the future.
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Trauma-informed counselling
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Meeting you where you are
Providing a judgement-free space for you to be heard, with compassion.
Offering acceptance and flexibility to bridge gaps.
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Understanding that your journey isn't linear. Embracing the messiness!
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Autonomy & Empowerment
Respecting your freedom to make independent choices. Collaborating with you rather than directing you.
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Equipping you with tools, knowledge and support to enhance your sense of agency.
Curiosity
Showing genuine respect and interest in who you, free from the weight of expectations.
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Equally intrigued by both your present circumstances and the inspiring layers of strength which bind your unique story.
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Safety, always
Protecting your privacy and guarding your emotional safety.
Cultivating trust through transparency and a foundation of honesty, respect and accountability.
Evidence-based practice
I care deeply about providing you with meaningful and effective support. It's not just about operating in an ethical manner, it's also because I know how important it is for you to get back on track as soon as possible.
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I combine well-researched theories concepts from neuroscience with established therapeutic techniques from counselling, psychology and psychotherapy to efficiently cut through the layers of confusion and uncertainty, and to help you go from strength to strength. ​​
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The main theory underpinning the work I do is called predictive processing. This is a theoretical framework which has been shown to treat challenging conditions such as PTSD more efficiently than most other treatment options.
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Feel free to book a consultation if you'd like to know more about my approach, or you want to see if it might work for you.